Thursday, July 31, 2014

trixha's incredibly effective guide to studying.

Also applicable to getting work done outside the office!

1. Pick a workspace that's comfortable, quiet and most importantly has wifi.
because you don't want to spend all your time asking the staff about their wifi and getting angry that you can't connect to it.

2. Get a drink or something to eat.
because even though you're here to leech wifi, you need to make sure they don't question your presence here.

3. Realize you're hungry and my my doesn't that cake look good.

4. Sit down to begin, but wait.
BFF msged you on skype and it's important. Bij. Like. The-Ring-To-Frodo Important.

"What do you think of Kate Spade bags?"

5. Turn on some relaxing music.
Apparently babies who listen to Beethoven turn out more intellectual should work on a adults too right? Dang, so many covers of L'arriseanne...and Chopin's Prelude No.4 in E-minor makes me depressed. Scroll till you find the right one.

6. Open your word doc to begin,

7. Realize that your tea needs a hot water refill, waltz over to the counter and ask for a refill.

8. Oh hold up son, that spaghetti looks good!
It's already 3 and you've not eaten lunch so mosey on over to the counter.
I'm listening to Tchaikovsky's dance of the Reed Pipes no, so I imagine myself doing a ballet tippy toe jump to the counter like Deedee in Dexters Laboratory with my arms flung in the air.

9. Yay, steamy pasta sits in front of you now.
...and since this is leisure time, you can't be studying and eating right? You aren't gonna concentrate anyway! So let's browse some instagram.

a. laugh at silly post from 9gag about TellyTubbies.
b. take a picture of your steamy pasta.
c. realize it isn't that nice a photo
d. delete
e. curse at the stupid person you're following who keeps posting nice food pictures up. Idiot.

told you guys.

10. Take a look at that word doc once again, but I think you need another refill on that tea!

11. Realize you've been so effectively working for the past few hours that you need to share your techniques. WITH THE WORLD! 

Open up blogger.

12. Look around the place for inspiration. 
See barrista is looking at you. Look away because you're Asian and aren't used to stranger-eye-contact. Chuckle to yourself because it's obviously because he's dubmfounded by your beauty...either that or because you've just realized that this whole time, you've been whipping your head around like a conductor with earphones on, while listening to Mozart's eine kleine natchmuzik (A little night music, which you probably shouldn't listen to at night if you want to sleep...unless you're intending to ride a horse bareback across a forest to look for your true love).

13. Use classical musical references for your post 
So you remember their names for your Music exam....and to sound smarter than you actually are. #nailedthatmotha'.

14. Little bit of cake left from just now, have some.
Because you deserve it!

15. Hate yourself, because all you do. is. eat!
but on the bright side, you can go home because it looks like it's gonna rain. Time to pack up and go home after the long tiring study day.

The end.