The best of English in direct translation. (Chinese)

Happy CNY everyone!
In the spirit of Chinese New Year this post is about phrases directly translated from Chinese to English. Funnily enough, we hear these English translated phrases in our everyday lives and do understand what they mean even though they don't make any sense at all.... in English. You follow? Great!

Some of these I didn't know were directly translated (guess cos I don't speak any form of Chinese) and some, I didn't even realize weren't proper English sentences until I really thought about it..whuut!


Here's a list of directly translated favourites and their meanings :



1. Wan/one

The other day I asked someone why we don't say two. haha! then I realized this was directly translated.

a) depicts a question or when confused : "Why he go there one"

By using wan/one at the end of a question sentence, you can sometimes disregard the use of a question mark. 

b) to point out ownership of something : "The phone is Emily's one"

c) to state something obvious : "Nobody will buy smelly toufoo perfume one" 


2. Say people your own self!

The last time I heard this it was from a small boy but still! I'm quite amazed even after saying it slowly and realizing that Microsoft Word would green squiggly line the whole sentence I see almost nothing wrong with this sentence. I've never felt more Malaysian in my life.

a) most commonly used when someone is insulting you and you have no better comeback : "You call me stupid! Say people your own self!" ( if you called me stupid that only means that you're the stupid one)


3. Go what go / do what do /sing what sing

a) usually said when angered and have no other way of verbally expressing your anger.

b) also may be used to express ridiculousness.

As Tucky opened the door to leave he said "Dad I'm going to my friends house to play Mah Jong!" "Go what go! So late already! Everyday also want to go out!" his father replied.



4. ____________ (insert any kind of word)  your head!

a) also used to express ridiculousness :

"I'm think I wanna go for a manicure today."
"Manicure your head! Everyday spend money."



5. You like ah

a) a way of telling someone that the decision is up to them :

"You feel like having sushi?"
"You like ah"



6. What time now?!

a) a rhetorical question that isn't meant to be answered. Used when someone, usually your parent/girlfriend/boyfriend/wife, is telling you off. Is used in reference to your lateness :

" You don't want to come home yet ah! You said you gonna be back at 2pm! What time now?!"



7. Give face / show face

a) used when meaning to say "don't embarrass me/him/she/that person" :

"I was really going to shout at him but there were so many people so I give him face"

b) a small form of curtail respect :

" I don't want to go for her party la but she invited. We go awhile only la, just to show face"



8. Where got?

a) used when presented with a new or surprising information.

" he said your new house was 2 million ringgit ah? " 
" where got?! This house not so expensive wan la"



9. You see you / you see ah

a) used in a judgmental tone usually meant to point out a fault or something you did wrong :

" you see you! So careless spill the coffee on my shirt"

b) a Malaysianized way of saying "I told you so" :

"ah you see ah! You see ah! Tell you to hold with the coffee with two hands you don't want to listen"


That's the list so far. It will be added to.

Tong Tong tong chiang!

There's always this one person..

...who has

 her hair..

strategically.. 

covering one eye..

in every picture on facebook.

 

here's my next profile picture

I'm sorry your life sucks.

When,

The hair salon you want to go to is too far away. I'm sorry your life sucks.
You want to go for a day trip, but it's too long a drive. I'm sorry your life sucks.
There's a party you want to go for but it ends too late. I'm sorry your life sucks.
You have free concert tickets but it's gonna be too crowded. I'm sorry your life sucks.
You're too tired from work to do anything. I'm sorry your life sucks.
You don't have money but are too lazy to work. I'm sorry your life sucks.
You wanna catch a movie but the movie's too long. I'm sorry your life sucks.
You can't fit into your dress but continue eating the chocolate in front of you. I'm sorry your life sucks. 



I haven't the foggiest why it does. No! Why indeed!?
When your life should be bursting with excitement and smelling like endless fun.

Some people are just like that....or rather, most.
They go about their melancholic day wondering why their life is dull, boring, uninteresting...bleh.

Then they realize why! It's because of the environment/conditions they are in!
So they complain about their jobs, about the house they live in, about their country, about the weather, about their finances, about their weight, about how they have nothing to look forward to, about the lack of excitement in their lives.

When you find life dull but do nothing anything about it. I'm sorry your life sucks. 

WHY? Why do we do this?
Especially when there are so many people who literally have nothing!
Who can literally spend the whole day thinking about how their life literally sucks.
Who literally have no money! Literally dying of hunger! Literally have to walk miles to a shit job! (can mean this literally for people who have to literally work around shit)

"omg...she's making this a donate-to-starving-people speech!"

 
..But seriously why!


Why can't we make the most of life and think of all the things we have?
Or take the things we don't like about it and turn it around.
Why don't we go the extra mile or 2 or 3 or 4 to make the most of it? 
Grab life by the neck and embrace the sonnova'!


Great now I'm starting to sound like a hippie. I don't live in a home, I live in the moment. -.-Y


What have you done this year that you can say "I can't believe I did that" to?

Okay I can name one! I helped build a house for Orang Asli.(click) I can't believe I did that.
People who look at me automatically think I hate the outdoors and all I do is shop.
I like the outdoors okay!! but I had to stay near the site in a dorm, away from the comforts of my home, my bed and internet....live with the bugs for 3 days...do physical work in the sun while being covered in dirt, sawdust, sweat and who knows what (and I'm the type of person who washes my hand everytime I pat my dog)... and most of all, I had to PAY to do it.

There were so many factors against me going, but when I really thought about it I wanted to make the most of my free time, I wanted to do something that I haven't done before and I wanted to do it for the people who had little. (I mean, if someone asked me to help build Lim Kok Thay ( Lim Goh Tong's son) a bungalow on the foot of Genting, I'd probably tell the person to fly a kite) And anyway, I'm glad I went! I had fun, more fun that I thought I would, I met new people and I have a "when I was young.." story to tell my grandchildren...and I would go again.



So what I'm saying is, your life is as good as you make it to be. If you can't be bothered to do things, see things or be anywhere then you shouldn't be complaining about it.

When you make excuses because you're too damn lazy. I'm sorry your life sucks.

Polite nodding.

Let's say you're the country's ..Lawn Bowling Champion
And one day you're having a conversation with your friend about how
you won your International Lawn Bowling Championship ( just an example la huh)
You're going on with much animated enthusiasm about how you swung (or is it rolled?...strike?)
and won 1st place in the championship, how you train everyday and how you are
as determined as Smeagol trying to get the ring from Frodo.
You go on, and realize that your friend is smiling, responding in 'ahh's and 'wow's while nodding along at what you're telling her. You wonder why she's not saying much
but then you're thinking she must be so intrigued at your winning title.

Congratulations!, she's politely nodding at you.

Because...you're so damn full of yourself.

I don't know about you, but I'd rather meet up with someone and have proper interactive talks about our lives, what we're doing or even something like..how your mother is.
When talking/bonding/catching up with someone, you obviously want to try to make the conversation interesting right?

Let's say you are Malaysia's Lawn Bowling Champion.
Would I really want to meet up with you to talk about your Lawn Bowling? NO.
Because :

1. If I wanted to know about how you're doing lawn-bowling wise, I'd just read it up online
(esp since you're Malaysia's Lawn Bowling Champion, you're probably not hard to find)
2. I'd follow you on twitter, where you can talk about how your swing (or is it strike??) has gone better, or how you're so tan now that you're in the sun.
3. I'd look up your profile on facebook/instagram/foursquare

I'd be happy for you, my friend, a Lawn Bowling Champion!
probably ab-tastic, having a posse and representin'.
But if I'm no stranger to you, sometimes maybe sometimes, I'd like to know more about how you're doing other than all the swinging (striking?),tanning,push ups you've been doing.
I would've probably stalked you in all social media platforms, that I even know when you poop okay.

I mean don't get me wrong, if you (the Lawn Bowling Champion) started playing the violin
and picked it up in 4 days, got famous on youtube and was scouted,
by all means go on about how excited you are and violin is your new passion.
We're catching up because I want to talk to you about how you've been, especially if it's
your new passion, like violin. I don't want to hear you go on and on about Lawn Bowling!
and casually slipping in Lawn Bowling in to every conversation:

' I like papayas '
' Ya. I eat papayas everyday for fibre, that's essential now that I'm training for my
Asian Lawn Bowling Championship!'
..

' I started playing Skyrim, I never expected I would enjoy it..doesn't it seem like playing a hardcore Harry Potter game?! '
' Just like how I started Lawn Bowling, and didn't' expect to enjoy it so much but it requires more physical strength than a computer game la'

..

' I won 10 years worth of Peanut Butter M&M's!
I never expected to win it when I entered the "win 10 years supply of Peanut Butter M&M's" contest.
' Just like how I never expected to win The Lawn Bowling Championship of Countries on the Equator. People ask me if I enter these games to win, I don't!
I just enter to see where I rank in the countries on the equator '

* holds imaginary gun to own head*
but with the humble bragging..maybe I should hold an imaginary gun to your head instead

I'd rather have stupid conversations about the Lady whos mouth got impregnanted by a squid, than listen to how shiny your lawn bowling throphies are. I'm already your friend so you really don't need to impress me. You could have snot running from your nose and I'd still be your friend, laugh at you, but still be your friend.

I'm sure Datuk LCW doesn't go to his friends baby's fullmoon and go on about how he trained
for the Olympics, or how has so much free,sponsored,endorsed 100 plus he can bathe in it,
or how he got unexpectingly close to PM's wife, Rosmah because of Badminton till she wants to hug him!

Sometimes people forget that it's not all about them.
Sometimes, not everyone wants to hear about what Lawn Bowling prizes you have on your shelf.

Let's try to be more conscious about what others are saying, not just conscious about who listens to us and all our achievements. Let's try be more interesting conversation. Here's to, minimal awkward polite nodding! *clink*


Ps. I don't actually know a lawn bowling champion.
Ps2. The examples above are extremely exaggerated, thankfully, no one I know is that obnoxious
Ps3. I laughed to myself at Ps2 , I crack myself up hur hur hur.

Madcoaster.

I just downloaded this game called Madcoaster on my iphone.
It's damn addictive! Like more addictive than temple run addictive!
Does everyone or no one play this?
I started today and I'm on the level with jetpacks in space.
Okay I'm gonna go continue *points fingers together*

//

no lvl with jetpacks. That's just a bonus round thing.
I did however, get to the cow in the pink tutu!

Because I want to remember what's happened/happening for the year...
I'm on blogger again!

Most memorable things that have happened to me so far:

#1 : I've graduated! - which is a good thing because ..well let's not get into that *happy thoughts*
#2 : I got chicken pox right before graduation ): because theres no better time to get it than just before graduating! right?


I didn't do a New Years Resolution list...because I was busy with alot of things, it feels good to breathe now..*inhales ahhhhhhh* . I really can't believe it's already April. when did this happen? oh right probably when I was busy playing with floorplans.

So back to my New Years Resolution list (or quarter of the year's resolution list) :

#1 : Things to do this year!

I'm thinking a gap year. And I don't mean one to laze around rolling out of bed at 3pm, or partying the night away. With the free time I (finally) have, I want to do some fulfilling things this year. Like take up a sport, a language, learn new things, ( like the ukulele.. which is ..in progress). No solid plans now. But I'll play it by ear and hopefully not waste the time away.

#2 : Be less impulsive when shopping

No srsly. (Almost) every girl should have this on their list.

#3 : On the same note...

Try to wear different things everyday. With all the things I buy, I have no idea why I tend to stick to the same things. why bother buying new things if I'm going to leave it in the untouched corner of my cupboard.*shakes head disapprovingly*

#4 : Be less judgy.

I don't know if it's a chinese thing, (or not) but really..why are we/I so judgy? ( okay.. man up and admit it.. ) Like why do we/I have sometimes have opinions of things we probably care nothing about? Also why do we care about things we initially didn't care about just because someone said something about it? ..you follow? so anyway,

resolution right there.


#5 : Keep to my resolutions

Because everyone has to have this in their list of resolutions. haha.